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Wednesday, September 27, 2006
wat did i do wrong? juz wat the fuck did i do wrong? cant i say wat my heart feels? cant i say wat im thinking? am i wrong to remind u dat all u lack is confidence? y muz i say everything in a good kind way? y cant i remind u of the harsh truth..?
i am seriously sick and tired of wearing a mask.. sick and tired of being a good guy, smile, joke, larf, pretend i enjoy the company of the fucking idiots in camp.. so y izzit dat at the end of the bloody dae, when im faced wif u, i stil haf to put on such a mask? y cant i b myself? if i cannot even b myself when im wif u, wats the point..?
if u seriously want me to put on the mask, i will.. i can.. i will juz larf and entertain u.. i'll make sure u feel happy and delighted wif me becoz i'll be patronising u so well u dun even noe wat the hell is going on..
but i dunwan to.. i dunwan to b faking it when im wif u.. i wanna tell u wats really wrong, vent my frustration and feel sian and dejected.. i want to show u the side of me dat is exhausted frm patronising ppl all day long.. i want u to b the only person who shares such emotions wif me.. not b another one hu nids me to patronise..
yes for ur info after i put down the fone immediately i quarrelled wif my parents coz they were being ridiculous.. which explains my sms.. but i guess u din catch dat so fuck it.. im juz too tired to try to explain to u dat i quarrelled wif them and dat maple keeps fucking disconnecting and yes i cant lvl up today.. all bad things come at once..
and juz in case u get it all wrong.. im not reprimanding u.. im juz venting it out coz u r currently not free to listen to me.. i hope its juz currently..


Evalasting Journey..
11:13 PM